As I sit here on January 1st of 2024 and reflect on the last year, I’m just in awe of what God brought me through. It was a year that stretched me in ways I never thought possible; a year that changed me at my core. Through the highs and lows, the triumphs and tribulations, I stand here today in awe of what God has done. As I say all of the time, we don’t fail, we learn. And I learned A LOT in 2023.

After reflecting back, I wanted to share my biggest lessons from 2023 with you.

Just because I can do it, doesn’t mean I SHOULD do it.
This year I celebrated 8 years as an entrepreneur. A good amount of those 8 years was a lot of blood sweat and tears. I’ve taken on many roles as a business owner over the years, but in order to grow and not burn yourself out, I learned you have to delegate and let go of some control. With that in mind, I learned the value of building a rock solid leadership team this year. In the past, I believed building a leadership team meant hiring full time employees but this year I learned it doesn’t. In fact, it can look however I need it to so long as it works for me and helps accomplish my business goals. Additionally, I discovered scaling my company didn’t necessarily mean taking on the full financial responsibility of a large team. By strategically delegating and allowing others to operate in their strengths, I witnessed the impactful synergy of a well-rounded leadership team. (More on how I did that later!)

What got me here won’t take me where I’m going.
I talked earlier about what it took to grow my company (a lot of blood sweat and tears over the years). There were numerous times we didn’t have the resources to do what needed to be done therefore many had to take on multiple roles in order to accomplish our goals. I’ve realized that process can only take you so far and also limits the overall impact you can have. With this realization, I’ve learned God has a bigger plan and a bigger impact for me to make with my company. The impact God is paving a way for me to make is so much bigger than I could have imagined. With that, it’s also going to require a different level of talent and expertise that I’ve haven’t had before. Faced with this realization, I had a choice to make – do I accept this calling and rise to the level God was calling me to or do I fold back and stick with what I’ve known, living my life as I have and off of my investments?? I accepted the call and I automatically knew if I was going to rise to the next level, I needed to focus on what was in front of me and my team was going to have to do the same. All of us were going to have to do things we’ve never done before and in order to succeed, we were going to have to learn it, find a specialist to help, or hire someone to make it happen. I knew that I was asking a lot and also recognized not everyone would have the capacity to commit to the level I was calling them to. With that, I had to trust God that he would send me the people I needed to succeed moving forward. And guess what?!!! He did. 

When you don’t heal from your wounds, you bleed on others that didn’t cut you.
Believe it or not, the last 5 years of my life have not been easy. I’m not just talking about business – that’s expected. I’ve been through a lot in my personal life too. There have been times, that despite what was going on in my personal life, I’ve had to push through, show up, and do what needed to be done. At some point, if you don’t heal from your previous pain, it will come out one way or the other. This year, I found myself being less patient, easily irritated and simply not feeling like myself. Those who know me know for the most part, I’m very laid back. I’m not dramatic and I have a very logical driven brain. My personality is typically very straight to the point and direct. I guess you can say that I’m your typical “strong friend.” I remember one day I hung out with two of my best friends and noticed I was quiet and just not present.  When I left them and got home I sent them a text telling them, “I’m just letting you know that I’m not okay.” And I wasn’t. But the hard part was that I didn’t know what was going on and I was too busy with work and family life to figure it out. All I knew was I couldn’t keep going like I had been and something had to change. That’s when I decided to take some time off so I could get to the bottom of what was going on. When you’re going through hard times and you’re busy, it’s hard to check in with yourself. I needed to step back so that I could move forward. That required me to sacrifice and take a pause. 

Feelings that are buried alive don’t die.
I discovered a lot of things. What’s so beautiful is that I had a number of friends, specifically newer friends that didn’t know me extremely well, make a significant impact on me during this time. I don’t even think that they knew how much their honesty and support stuck with me. It helped me to really process the last 5 years and really see myself. Unearthing buried emotions led to difficult conversations and newfound clarity. I confronted the necessity of forgiving, letting go, and accepting the trajectory that God had laid out for me. This year became a season of healing, a turning point where feelings that were buried alive didn’t have to continue bleeding onto others.

Accept people for who they are, not who you want them to be.
Sometimes we want more for people than they want for themselves. I’ve also realized that sometimes they want it for themselves but they aren’t willing to do the work or make the sacrifices necessary to achieve what it is that they want. The realization that it’s okay to let people navigate their own paths without the weight of my expectations brought a sense of liberation. You have to let people be. And you know what, that’s ok. You will drive yourself crazy trying to create someone’s life for them.

Failures aren’t failing if you learn from them.
A lot of things didn’t go right the first half of the year. I’m used to adversity but this year I encountered adversity in my personal life and business at the same time! There were a number of things that I could have done differently and for a couple of months, I felt like I failed. It was really hard for me to move through it. I had to learn how to take that failure and turn it into a lesson. I prayed, read scriptures, listened to podcasts and read books. This mindset shift became the catalyst for transforming setbacks into stepping stones.

Don’t grow faster than your systems, you will pay for it either way.
When you grow faster than your systems, you will feel it very quickly. For instance, I doubled my portfolio overnight 😳 and then realized I was growing faster than my systems could handle. In turn, I had to hit the brakes, reassess, and strengthen my support structures so I could move forward successfully. Imagine fixing a car’s engine while it’s still on the highway – not easy, but it had to be done. Lesson learned: I have to have a solid foundation before chasing more growth. Since, I’ve Invested upfront in support structures to ensure stability and sustainability for the long haul moving forward. 

Plan for the best and the worst.
My friends say that I’m the most positive person they know. I just truly believe that with knowledge, hard work and strategy, most people can accomplish all of the goals they have and acquire all they want in life. I’m a very confident person and very self aware of my strengths so when I set out to do something, I believe the best result can take place. But here’s the thing, sometimes there are other factors that occur which are completely out of your control. That’s why it’s important to plan for the best and the worst so you’re prepared for everything.

People are good with you living small because that’s what they are used to.
Any time you experience extreme growth you may often feel criticism from those around you. Your growth can rub against other people’s insecurities. When you are living in God’s purpose, be ready for people that intentionally set out to make your life miserable. When you’re growing to another level, it requires a lot of energy and focus to push through all of the fears and anxiety. Being around the wrong people can literally drain the very energy you need to keep going. Remember that it’s easier for other people to tear down your dream because they don’t know how to build their own. 

God is not like people, he’s okay with you being needy.
This year I worked through a lot of past trauma. One of the hardest things I had to work through was my hesitation to depend on others. In a year of personal healing, I confronted my own hesitations around dependence. The lesson that God welcomes our neediness and dependence, unlike human relationships, became a huge revelation. Unlearning hyper-independence and embracing a childlike dependence on God opened doors to a deeper, more authentic connection with him. He doesn’t get annoyed by us or desire to get rid of us. He wants to provide for us and he delights in us needing him. I’m unlearning how to be hyper independent with God.

As  a Real Estate investor these lessons not only affect the success in my business but ultimately affect the success in my life.

Did you connect with any of these lessons? What was your biggest lesson of 2023? Did you plan to purchase an investment property last year but got scared and didn’t pull the trigger? The #1 reason that people get stuck investing in real estate is their lack of knowledge. Is your plan to purchase your first investment property in 2024? Here at The Owning it & Living it Community we have free resources to help you get started today. Click here to grab one of our free workshops to begin learning today.